User:Eiji-kun

'''I am Eiji the Plushie, Eiji the Destructor. I am the bringer of new ideas, and the destroyer with divine flame.'''



The Rest of It

 * "I realized I have a party to go to tomorrow, which I did remember, but then it hit me "OH WAIT WE'RE DRESSING FANCY LIKE GROWN-UPS" and even my snazziest tshirt and classiest cargo shorts were not going to cut it. I did the mad dash to Goodwill, and they were all "we're closing" and I'm all GIVE ME A SUIT JACKET AND SOME PANTS and they're like sir please put down that burning baby and I was all LET ME SHOP OR ALL YOUR BABIES ARE NEXT and they're all like we're calling the police and I'm all WHERE DO YOU THINK I GOT THIS BABY THAT I SET ON FIRE and they're all why would the police have baby and I was all TOO MANY QUESTIONS but by that point I had a jacket and vest and pants that kind of fit." -Spanambula, now with 1d6 babyfire a round.


 * "We use logic here."- Green Dragon.
 * "We use ratings here."- Undead Knave.
 * It's days like these I'm glad we have standards.


 * It used to be that unicorns loved young beautiful maidens who were pure of heart (meaning virgins, making the unicorn the first mythological slut-shamer)... -- Span, now in Lemon and Grape flavors.


 * "Drink some tea. It has the power of leaves, which is basically like absorbed sunlight, which is like converted space fire." -- Ganteka, Words of Wisdom on the Internets


 * Ever vigilant, looking into the Eye of Spam without fear. For the Plushiemperor!
 * When you have an awesome birthday, you get presents.
 * When you get presents, your mom makes you write thank-you notes.
 * When you have to write thank-you notes, you feel like you're being punished.
 * When you feel like you're being punished, you start to think about how you could have escaped punishment.
 * When you think about escaping punishment, you plan the perfect crime.
 * When you plan the perfect crime, you try to commit the perfect crime.
 * When you try to commit the perfect crime, it turns out to be not-so-perfect.
 * When it turns out to be not-so-perfect, you die in a hail of FBI gunfire.


 * Don't write thank-you notes because you'll die in a hail of gunfire.

---


 * Turbo bed, Turbo Bed, makes your consciousness turbo-dead.
 * Catches dreams,
 * Terrifies,
 * Muffles your screams
 * into sighs
 * LOOK OUT
 * Here comes the Turbo-beeeeed


 * Rocks deployed. Engaging Fox. Fox Rocks engaging, adding socks. Fox in socks with rocks at maximum, charging box. Box of Rocks for Fox in socks enabled. Require clocks for Fox Sock's box of rocks. Clocks received at docks by Jacques in smock, now loading clocks in box with rocks for fox socks. Jacques forms blocks from clocks rocks boxes to protect from incoming pox hawk flocks.... pox hawk flocks blocked by clock rocks box blocks, squawk! Require transport from docks for clock rock box armed socks fox. Talked to Jacques at docks, providing ox. Ox locked! Jacques Casts knock to flummox ox locks. Ox at docks, loading clocks rocks box for socks fox. Loading complete, ox walks, socks fox must defend against croc. Croc shocked, fried like wok. Sock Fox proceeding with ox with blocks of clock rock box. Additional reinforcements required. Deploying jocks.


 * Jocks deployed. Engaging Fox jocks. Fox jocks engaging, adding chalks...

---

=Temporary=

WORLD OF MEN Races:Neaderthal, Golden Men Gods: Zarus (LE), Mother Gaia (TN), Kamina-Expy (CG)

WORLD OF ELVES Races: Proto-feyelves, Proto-Spirit Animalfae Gods: Corellon Larethian (CG), Deer God (CN), Nightmare (CE)

WORLD OF GREEN Races: Gogs, Quasipredators Gods: Gruumesh (CE), Devouring Entropy (NE), The Hunter (LE)

WORLD OF ELEMENTALS Races: Proto-dwarf, Elemental Fey Gods: Earth God (TN), Water God (TN), Wind God (TN), Fire God (TN)

WORLD OF SCALES Races: Yaun-ti, Dragon Gods: Sertrous (CE), Sseth (CE), Bahamut (LG), Tiamat (CE)

WORLD OF MADNESS Races: Aboleths, Elder Ones Gods: Pisaethces the Blood Queen (CE), Shunyata Void (TN), Dagon (CE)

Make an Alicanto and Adamastor. Plane of Enhanced Magic Items, maybe the Infinite Blade Fields? CG Son Goku ToB God TN Shiva Expy ToB God LG Alsan Expy ToB God CE Apocalyptic Ancient Chaos Force ToB God The Wildlands Layer The Divine Domain of Goku The Divine Domain of Belacutros The Divine Domain of Shiva The Divine Domain of Aslan The Divine Domain of Chaos

Make an Elder Evil based on SCP-1682 - Solar Parasite.

Make a lycanicorn. A unicorn werewolf.

The following spells...
 * Cast Fist (Lesser, Normal, Greater, Nuclear)
 * Magic Trap... of Fist
 * Punch you in the SOOOOOUL
 * Revamp crappy Fist from the Heavens spell, make non-evil.
 * ATATATATATATATATA

=Notebook=

Z҉A҉L҉G҉O̚̕̚

“Something that allows him to approach non-combat tasks the way he approaches combat. He will nearly die baking that cake, but heaven help us if it isn’t the most kickass cake ever.”

You ask for a hamburger, I give you a hamburger. You raise it to your lips and take a bite. Your eye twitches involuntarily. Across the street a father of three falls down the stairs. You swallow and look down at the hamburger in your hands. I give you a hamburger. You swallow and look down at the hamburger in your hands. You cannot swallow. There are children at the top of the stairs. A pickle shifts uneasily under the bun. I give you a hamburger. You look at my face, and I am pleading with you. The children are crying now. You raise the hamburger to your lips, tears stream down your face as you take a bite. I give you a hamburger. You are on your knees. You plead with me to go across the street. I hear only children's laughter. I give you a hamburger. You are screaming as you fall down the stairs. I am your child. You cannot see anything. You take a bite of the hamburger. The concrete rushes up to meet you. You awake with a start in your own bed. Your eye twitches involuntarily. I give you a hamburger. As you kill me, I do not make a sound. I give you a hamburger. You asked me for a hamburger, and I gave you a raccoon. You asked me for a hamburger, but it turns out I don't really exist. Where I was originally standing, a picture of a hamburger rests on the ground. You awake as a hamburger. You start screaming only to have special sauce fly from your lips. The world is in sepia. Why are we speaking German? A mime cries softly as he cradles a young cow. Your grandfather stares at you as the cow falls apart into patties. You look down only to see me with pickles for eyes, I am singing the song that gives birth to the universe.

What is wrong with Eiji? Eiji is sitting there, naked. He is too thin. His mouth hangs slightly open as his eyes stare through everything, pitch black. Eiji is something wrong. What is wrong? You are too thin. Eiji's eyes stare through you. The room is damp. Eiji stares into the distance. His mouth is hanging slightly open. His mouth is pitch black. You are too thin. What are you looking at? Eiji is staring into the pitch black. You are too damp. The pitch black looks back at you. Who are we? Can't close your mouth. You see black. The air is damp. The room is small. How thin are you? Are you thirsty? The water is pitch black. The eyes are leaking. Who are we? You twitch.

=Complete Eiji=

This is a complex version of my Nav-Box.

SANDBOXES: Askastic Knight, God of Courage "Gilgaigar", Not-Spelljammer, Complete Transportation, Robots

Unique Magic-Types
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