Pan-Da (3.5e Monster)

"Stop me if you've heard this one..."

"NO MORE PUNS!!!"

"Well fine Mr. Touchy Wizard, I just guess I'll settle for doing things to you while you're sleeping."

The Pan-Da appears to be a slightly anthropomorphic panda with short stubby horns (or moose antlers), carrying reed pipes. Some even have cloven hooves for feet. They are whimsical forest guardians, preferring bamboo or pine forests to all others. Approached respectfully (or if offered wine, bamboo or honey) they can be excellent guides and helpers. Otherwise your in deep trouble as it decides to spend all it's time pulling pranks on you, or telling bad puns until you wish for death. They stand about 6' tall, weighing in at 350 pounds, and speak Common and Sylvan.

Combat
Pan-Da's usually avoid combat, using their Pipes or spells to lead opponents into trouble. However should this fail they have no problem wading in and beating the unholy crap out of individuals. Groups are another matter....groups they pick at one by one from the cover of the forest.

Pipes : Pan-Das can play a variety of magical tunes on their pan pipes. Usually, only one satyr in a group carries pipes. When it plays, all creatures within a 60-foot spread (except fey) must succeed on a DC 17 Will save or be affected by Charm Person, Sleep, or Fear (caster level 10th; the Pan-Da chooses the tune and its effect).

In the hands of other beings, these pipes have no special powers. A creature that successfully saves against any of the pipe’s effects cannot be affected by the same set of pipes for 24 hours. The save DC is Charisma-based.

Spellcasting: The Pan-Da casts spells as a 5th Level Bard.

Wild Empathy: This is identical to the Druid class feature, except the Pan-Da has a +6 Racial Bonus on the roll.