Joker (3.5e NPC)

"You need to brighten up!"

Common Tactics
The joker is all about egging (sometimes literally) opponents to attack him. Making them forget about that trip mine, or giant. And once you finally have him cornered he wisps away like smoke - making opponents thing that their mind was playing tricks - "he said it was a portabella but, holy SHIT!"

scouts (2 rangers, and 1 warrior) ordered by frequency of use
 * round 1: immobilise rangers - Battle Acupuncture; or attack with Squeaky Hammer, or dagger and Main Gauche
 * round 2: attack with Squeaky Hammer, or dagger and Main Gauche (Two-Weapon Rend)
 * round 3: Vampiric Touch; or repeat
 * round 4: repeat

patrol (1 ranger, 3 warriors) ordered by frequency of use
 * round 1: Battle Acupuncture; or attack with dagger and Main Gauche, or Squeaky Hammer
 * round 2: attack with dagger and Main Gauche (Two-Weapon Rend), or Squeaky Hammer
 * round 3: Vampiric Touch; or repeat
 * round 4: repeat

small party with mostly physically weak PC's (about 3 spell-casters, 1 ranger, 1 warrior, and 1 other) ordered by frequency of use
 * round 1: distract - Hideous or Shattering Screech, Clown Gags, Hypnotic Pattern, or Daze
 * round 2: immobilise spell casters - Shattering Screech, or Battle Acupuncture; Echo Madness; Clown Gags; or Two-Weapon Rend
 * round 3: attack; or continue above
 * round 4: attack; immobilise everyone else; tie-up immobilised; or Two-Weapon Rend
 * round 5: fall back if hurt; Vampiric Touch; immobilised; attack; or Two-Weapon Rend
 * round 6: repeat

small party with mostly physically strong PCs (about 1 spell-caster, 2 rangers, and 3 warriors) ordered by frequency of use
 * round 1: distract - Hideous or Shattering Screech, Clown Gags, Hypnotic Pattern, or Daze
 * round 2: full round attack with all uzi's (fire 2, then drop - fire other two); Silent Image with Ventriloquism; or Two-Weapon Rend
 * round 3: severely hurt victims: immobilise, Two-Weapon Rend, or Vampiric Touch; or go invisible and Sneak Attack
 * round 4: go invisible and Sneak Attack; Clown Gags; full round attack with a normal uzi
 * round 5: melee attack; Clown Gags; Vampiric Touch severely hurt victims
 * round 6: repeat

large party with low level PC's (about 5 spell-caster/psionic, 2 ranger, 3 warrior, 1 other PC builds; all at least 4 levels below Joker) ordered by frequency of use
 * round 1: full round attack with all uzi's (fire 2, then drop - fire other two); or distract - Hideous or Shattering Screech, Clown Gags, Hypnotic Pattern, or Daze
 * round 2: go invisible and Sneak Attack; or severely hurt victims: immobilise or Vampiric Touch
 * round 3: Shattering Screech; copy himself - Silent Image with Ventriloquism; or Battle Acupuncture
 * round 4: severely hurt victims: Vampiric Touch, or immobilise; or go invisible and Sneak Attack
 * round 5: repeat

big guy (1 powerful brute; with at least 300 hp and 7HD) ordered by frequency of use
 * round 1: distract - Hideous or Shattering Screech, Clown Gags; or Battle Acupuncture
 * round 2: Battle Acupuncture; copy himself - Silent Image with Ventriloquism; or attack with Squeaky Hammer
 * round 3: attack with Squeaky Hammer; or unload 2 uzis
 * round 4: run and unload an uzi; attack with Squeaky Hammer; unload an uzi; or Vampiric Touch
 * round 5: repeat

Evil Clown
 (Ex): With a disturbing and insulting joke, an evil clown can add insult to injury and deal extra damage. By making a successful Perform (Comedy) check opposed by the target's modified level check (1d20 + character level or hit dice + target's wisdom bonus [if any] + target's modifiers on saves against effects from the enchantment school), an evil clown may deal extra damage on a number of attacks in that round equal to his Charisma bonus, minimum 1. This check may be made only one time per round, and is a free action. This extra damage is 1d6 at 1st level, and it increases by 1d6 every two evil clown levels thereafter. Ranged attacks can count as tomfoolery only if the target is within 30 feet. This damage is never nonlethal damage. Tomfoolery is only effective against creatures that can see and/or hear the evil clown (including through blindsight) and have an intelligence score of at least 3. Tomfoolery is a mind-affecting effect.

 (Su): As a free action a number of times per round equal to his charisma modifier, minimum 1, an evil clown may magically produce items for his other abilities, as specified in the descriptions of the individual abilities. This ability can be used even when it isn't the evil clown's turn.

The balloon animal animates, and gains the abilities of a familiar belonging to a sorcerer of a level equal to the evil clown's class level. This familiar is treated as a construct, rather than a magical beast. When a balloon familiar is subject to slashing or piercing damage, it takes triple the normal damage. An evil clown does not lose experience if this familiar is destroyed, but cannot create another balloon familiar until the next day. Any natural weapons the familiar has deal nonlethal damage. If the familiar is within reach, the evil clown may change the familiar to the shape of any other familiar from the standard list as a full-round action. The balloon familiar is otherwise identical to a sorcerer's familiar.

This language cannot be learned by anyone who is not an evil clown, no matter how hard they try to learn it. The language is spoken by emitting squeaks of various lengths and pitches, and the written language looks like a cross between sheet music and morse code.

 (Ex): When unarmored and unencumbered, the evil clown adds his Charisma bonus (if any) to his AC. In addition, an evil clown gains a +1 bonus to AC at 5th level. This bonus increases by 1 for every five evil clown levels thereafter (+2 at 10th, +3 at 15th, and +4 at 20th level). These bonuses to AC apply even against touch attacks or when the evil clown is flat-footed. He loses these bonuses when he is immobilized or helpless, when he wears any armor, when he carries a shield, or when he carries a medium or heavy load.

 (Ex): An evil clown gains a circumstance bonus to intimidate checks against nonevil creatures equal to 1/2 his class level as his skin pales, his nose grows red and bulbous, and his hair gradually becomes one or more unnatural colors.

These gags can be spent on various abilities as detailed below. Any save DCs are equal to 10 + 1/2 the evil clown's class level + his charisma modifier.

 : As a standard action, an evil clown may spend 3 gags to use Slow as a spell-like ability, with a caster level equal to his class level. This is a mind-affecting fear effect.

 : As a standard action, an evil clown may spend 1 gag to shoot selzter water at a single creature within 10 ft., dazing it for a number of rounds equal to the evil clown's charisma modifier, minimum 1. The creature is entitled to a Fortitude save to negate this effect. An evil clown can make a DC 10 Perform (Comedy) check to use his hammerspace ability to produce the requisite bottle of seltzer water.

 : As an immediate action, an evil clown may spend 3 gags to throw a banana peel at a single creature that is moving from one square to another, under its own power and while touching the ground. The evil clown makes a ranged touch attack against the target, with a range incerement of 10 ft. If the attack hits, the enemy falls prone and ends their move. An evil clown can make a DC 20 Perform (Comedy) check to use his hammerspace ability to produce the requisite banana peel.

 : As a standard action, an evil clown may spend 1 gag to throw a cream pie at a single creature with discernable eyes. The evil clown makes a ranged touch attack with a range increment of 10 ft. If the attack hits, the enemy is rendered blind until it takes a standard action to wipe off the cream. An evil clown can make a DC 10 Perform (Comedy) check to use his hammerspace ability to produce the requisite cream pie.

 : An evil clown must declare that he is using this ability before he makes his attack roll (thus, a failed attack roll ruins the attempt). By spending 2 gags, an evil clown can confuse a foe damaged by his squeaky hammer for a number of rounds equal to the evil clown's charisma modifier, minimum 1. A successful Fortitude save negates. An evil clown can make a DC 15 Perform (Comedy) check to produce the requisite squeaky hammer with his hammerspace ability. A squeaky hammer is identical to a warhammer, except that it deals nonlethal damage. Unlike most nonlethal weapons, the wielder of a squeaky hammer cannot take a -4 penalty on attack rolls in order to deal lethal damage.

 : By spending 3 gags, an evil clown can use a move action to mount a unicycle and either juggle clubs or hold a quarterstaff for balance. He can maintan this for a number of rounds equal to his charisma modifier, minimum 1. After this period of time, the clown must make a balance check each round, DC 10 for the first check, with the DC increasing by 2 each round. Failure means that the evil clown falls off and end up prone. While riding his unicycle like this, he can make flurries of blows with a quarterstaff or thrown clubs as a monk of a level equal to the evil clown's class level. Dismounting is a free action. An evil clown can make a DC 20 Perform (Comedy) check to produce the requisite unicycle, club, or quarterstaff, with a separate check and use of hammerspace to produce each item.

 : By spending 1 gag, an evil clown can magically produce circus music and laugh maniacally at a single creature within close range (25 ft. + 5 ft./2 levels) to which he has line of sight. The creature must make a Will save or be shaken for a number of rounds equal to the evil clown's charisma modifier, minimum 1.

 : By spending 2 gags, an evil clown can magically produce circus music and laugh maniacally at a single creature within close range (25 ft. + 5 ft./2 levels) to which he has line of sight. The creature must make a Will save or be frightened for a number of rounds equal to the evil clown's charisma modifier, minimum 1.

 : By spending 3 gags, an evil clown can magically produce circus music and laugh maniacally at a single creature within close range (25 ft. + 5 ft./2 levels) to which he has line of sight. The creature must make a Will save or be panicked for a number of rounds equal to the evil clown's charisma modifier, minimum 1.

Schismsoul
 (Su): A Schismsoul scribes a rune into her body somewhere, acting as a binding point for her other mental psyches and enabling her to control her other forms while retaining a semblance of sanity. Once bound these fragments of personality are hers to control. A Schismsoul starts out with two separate egos chosen from the list below, and gains another at 3rd, and every 2 levels afterward. Switching between egos is a standard action. When an ego is active, the appropriate rune lights up, and subtle changes become apparent on the subject, who channels the particular mind. Egos change your visible alignment, but it is a false alignment and will not matter for magical effects such as Unholy Blight. All spell-like abilities of the egos are 10 + 1/2 character level + Cha with a caster level equal to your character level. At 4th level switching egos becomes a move action. This improved to a swift action at 8th. In any case, discarding a particular ego is a free action.

 (Su): A joker and a prankster, the fool does not know seriousness. Everything is a game to the fool. The fool gains 1/2 his class level to Sleight of Hand and Bluff checks. At 1st level, the fool may tease and make fun of an opponent up to 1 time per class level. The opponent makes a Will save against DC 10 + 1/2 character level + Cha or feel uncomfortable, giving a -1 morale penalty to all skills, attack rolls, and saving throws for 1 minute. At 3rd level, this becomes -2, at 6th level it becomes -3, and at 9th level the penalty becomes -4. This is a mind-effecting affect that only works on creatures with an Int score of 3 or higher. However, you do not have to speak the same language if you are good at pantomiming. At 10th level, your foolishness has the additional effect of increasing the enemy's fumble range to 1-3. While manifesting the fool, your alignment appears to be Chaotic Neutral.

 (Su): Power gets to one's head sometimes, the power is obsessed with it, always seeking new ways to find more power. There need not be a reason, the journey itself is the goal. The power receives several, limited, spells. He selects spells from the sorcerer/wizard list, once chosen he cannot swap out his spells. All spells he can cast at each level may be cast 1 + Cha/day. At 1st level he gains a 1st level spell, and another at 2nd level. At 3rd level he gains a 2nd level spell and another at 4th level. At 5th level he gains a 3rd level spell and another at 6th level. At 7th level he gains a 4th level spell, and another at 8th level. At 9th level he gains a 5th level spell, and at 10th level he gains a 6th level spell. These spells are spell-like abilities. While manifesting the power, your alignment appears to be Neutral Evil.

 (Su): The slasher is a lunatic who revels in the pain of others, and does to methodically by his own mad plans. Uncaring, he excels at causing suffering to others. While manifesting the slasher, you gain the ability to sneak attack, which stacks with any pre-existing sneak attack you have. You have 1d6 at 1st level, and every 2 levels to 5d6 at 9th level. At 10th level you gain the ability to Hide In Plain Sight. While manifesting the slasher, your alignment appears to be Lawful Evil.

 (Su): Be it shy, or be it sneaky, the subtle simply does not get noticed in a crowd. The subtle receives 1/2 their class level to Hide and Move Silently checks. At 1st level, you are able to make hide checks in a crowd of people without actually ducking or being suspicious. At 3rd level you are under the constant effect of a Nondetection effect. At 5th, you gain Invisibility every 1 + Cha mod/day (minimum 1), as the spell. At 7th you become aware of anyone attempting to scry you as if under the effects of Detect Scrying. At 9th your invisibility becomes Greater Invisibility if you so desire. At 10th, unless trying to be noticed, people must make a Spot check against you even if you walked into the room, the DC being your Hide score + 1. While manifesting the subtle, your alignment does not appear at all, as if the caster attempted to scan an object.

' (Sp):''' At 2nd level the Schismsoul is able to shift her body to resemble the form of the mind she desires. She gains the ability to use Alter Self at will, but can only shift into a limited number of pre-set forms. She can have up to the number of alter egos she has available, for example, an 8th level Schismsoul has 6 different alternate forms to choose from.

 (Ex): At 3rd level, the Schismsoul manages to invoke some harmony within her mental framework, and the various minds help each other when it comes to survival. The DC and caster level for any of her ego powers rises by +1. At 6th level this improves to +2 DC and caster level. At 9th level the improvement rises again to +3 DC and caster level.

 (Su): At 5th level when subjected to any enchantment spell which is successfully resisted through a successful saving throw, or immunity, the Schismsoul may reflect the spell back at its caster with the same DC and caster level as before by inflicting herself with 1 point of Wisdom damage. In the case of such spells such Charm Person the caster in control of their behavior is the Schismsoul.

Jack of Swords


When an attack roll is made against him, he may choose to make an Opposed Attack Roll. If his attack roll is greater than his opponent's attack roll, The Attack is treated as a Miss. At 2nd level, he may do this twice a round, and at third level, he may do this three times a round.





Succedaneum Bloodline (Intermediate)
'''Ability boost:
 * +1 Cha

Skill Boost +2 Disguise

Affinity: +2 affinity with Succedaneum

Specials:
 * Maddening Screech (3.5e Feat)
 * Improved Screech (3.5e Feat)
 * Shattering Screech (3.5e Feat)

Variants used for this NPC.


 * Publication:Unearthed Arcana/Character Flaws
 * Publication:Unearthed Arcana/Frail
 * Paranoia (3.5e Flaw)


 * Publication:Unearthed Arcana/Weapon Group Feats - treated as a bard
 * (Publication:Unearthed Arcana/Weapon Group - Exotic Weapons (Feat))
 * (Publication:Unearthed Arcana/Weapon Group (Light Blades))


 * Balanced Character Wealth by Level (3.5e Variant Rule)
 * Feat Purchasing (3.5e Variant Rule)